[benellis58]

I believe the GIBBO robots play Smolen...so why don't they play it in this situation? Oh yeah, right: silly question. They obviously don't play it in this situation, because to do so would...MAKE SENSE!

https://www.bridgeba...HJ%7Cpc%7CD6%7C

[benellis58]

I have received a hand from a fellow BBO member who plays in robot games. The member is someone James Bond fans might know. His name is eel007007.

According to Eel, this hand was from a "Challenge a Robot" game, which is perhaps why all four positions are identified as "Robot". For SURE South was a robot, as you will immediately know when you examine the play!

Eel wrote "Check out trick one!"

Yes, the play to trick one HAD to have been made by a robot!

https://www.bridgeba...h8%7Cpc%7Chk%7C

[benellis58]

Some typically pathetic GIB definitions:

1C: "Minor suit opening...". Hey, GIB, unlike GIBBO robots, most BBO users are not total C.R.E.T.I.N.S., so they already KNOW that 1C is a "minor suit opening" and do NOT have to be CONSTANTLY told. Furthermore, even if they did NOT know, how would this "new" bit of knowledge be of ANY use WHATSOEVER in actually explaining what the bid SHOWS?

1H: "One-level overcall...". Gee, thanks SO much, GIB! I bet no one would EVER have figured that out if you hadn't mentioned it!

Double: "1- club...". WHY, pray tell? Why the HELL must West have at most one club? And, for the record, note that he actually has TWO clubs, so he's ignoring his own GIB definition! Maybe I shouldn't blame him for that, though, because you might as well ignore the GIB definitions, since they are so often nothing but garbage.

Great double of 2D, by the way - it only made ONE overtrick.

Please either incinerate the GIBBO robots and GIB definitions or bury them in a landfill. They are useless and worthless.

https://tinyurl.brid...se.com/2a23jwa2

[benellis58]

Trick 8: East wins his club king. Trick 9: The fleabrained GIBBO piece of trash returns a ...CLUB (!), allowing declarer to claim. GIBBO robots are worse than even the WORST human player I have ever encountered in my life. GIBBO robots stink.

https://tinyurl.brid...se.com/mwkj5twb

[benellis58]

Does North lead a heart, the suit that he bid, and the suit where he has the KQ? No. Does he lead a spade, the suit that his partner bid, and a suit where he himself has four cards? No. He's a GIBBO robot, so he leads a club from his worthless 97 doubleton.

I blame myself for not beating the contract, though., because I broke my own cardinal rule, which is "Always play all GIBBO robots to be complete and total I.D.I.O.T.S." Here, I foolishly thought that the M.O.R.O.N. might actually have a REASON for leading the club 9. Mea culpa!

https://tinyurl.brid...se.com/3dm6t85m

[benellis58]

One of the many reasons that the execrable GIBBO robots are among the worst "bridge players" of all time is that they are among the worst leaders of all time. The ONLY "bridge players" who were worse at opening leads were GIBBO's immediate predecessors, the hopeless, disgusting GIB robots.

On this hand, the GIBBO dimwit in the East thinks, for some unfathomable reason, that a spade will work out better than a heart. Then, having made his feebleminded decision to lead a spade, he is SO unutterably stupid that he can't even lead the RIGHT spade. From 10986, the imbecile leads the SIX. What makes this especially amusing is that from 109-EMPTY-fifth or sixth, these stooges will almost invariably lead (and waste) the TEN. Their motto should be "We are proud GIBBO robots and we are proud to say that if there is a WRONG way to do something, we WILL find it and we WILL do it."

https://www.bridgeba...C3%7Cmc%7C13%7C

[benellis58]

West leads his stiff 9 of spades against South's 4H. Why? Well, maybe he's hoping to ruff the second spade with one of his...NON-EXISTENT TRUMPS!

https://www.bridgeba...C8%7Cmc%7C12%7C

[benellis58]

North has a perfectly normal 2H call in response to South's double. so he bids two...DIAMONDS. Why? Because he's a GIBBO robot, which, as we all know, means that he is a complete I.D.I.O.T. who has no idea about how to play bridge, but who LOVES to cuebid...for absolutely no reason.

Later, over South's 3D, he LEAPS to FOUR hearts. Golly gee, let's see what he's trying to show. Let's check the GIB definition!

Ahh, HERE it is: "4+ hearts; 11+ total points". Aha - just as I suspected: The GIB definition is, as usual, TOTALLY WORTHLESS GARBAGE. What does it tell us?

It tells us that he COULD have FOUR HEARTS...or he COULD have THIRTEEN...or he could have ANY number BETWEEN four and thirteen.

But wait! Because it also tells us this VERY important and VERY precise information about his points: He COULD have 11...or he COULD have 37...or he COULD have anywhere in between...or maybe even MORE than 37, since GIB is not talking about HIGH-CARD points, but "total" points.

Of course, since GIB knows NOTHING about "total" points, this definition is even MORE useless. It is total, complete GARBAGE that is a waste of time to read and was a waste of time for GIB to write. Why does GIB even BOTHER with definitions if they are going to be completely vague, useless drivel such as this?

Still, there was one bright light in this ugly blotch of darkness: At least the definition did not start with some classically annoying GIB description such as "jump in new suit".

Please: THROW OUT GIB. THROW OUT GIBBO. Replace them with DECENT robots and DECENT definitions.

https://www.bridgeba...CJ%7Cpc%7CH2%7C

[benellis58]

Third seat white, East passes with 976, AK864, K105, J8 - a hand that the vast majority of bridge players would open in the modern world. Yes, I realize that Alvin Roth and Tobias Stone, two highly successful players, might ALSO have passed the hand...back in 1957!

But fear not, because East later "compensates" as ONLY a GIBBO robot can...by STUPIDLY bidding the same values twice...thanks to his silly, undisciplined 3H call, which doesn't even match his own GIB definition. He does NOT have the "6+ hearts" that he is supposed to.

Speaking of not having what he is supposed to, look no further than North, another GIBBO piece of trash (as they ALL are), who does NOT have the "4+ spades" that his 2S call "promisess".

It is LONG past the time that GIB and GIBBO should have been thrown out and replaced. If there ever WAS a time that they served a purpose (and to be fair, there ONCE was), it was a long, LONG time ago. Wayne Gretzky was a pretty good hockey player DECADES ago, but no NHL team would want him on its roster TODAY...and NOBODY should want to have to play with or against GIBBO robots TODAY...or EVER again!

https://www.bridgeba...CHT%7Cmc%7C8%7C

[benellis58]

We did okay, scoring 71.4 % on the board for holding 1NT to seven tricks, but I think it was both wrong and wimpy of North not to bid 1S. (Yes, I see that he has only 3 HCP and is at unfavourable vulnerability, but I still think he's clueless and cowardly.)

https://tinyurl.brid...se.com/5y4723a7

[benellis58]

Trick four: East wins his diamond king - a fatal and costly error. It allows me to take ELEVEN tricks and allows HIM to...add yet ANOTHER complete zero to his MASSIVE lifetime collection.

https://tinyurl.brid...se.com/2p8nstuw

[benellis58]

Just about everyone - even including me (!) - is willing to admit that declarer play is the best part - by FAR - of the game for GIBBO robots.

But just because it's what these pond scum are BEST at, it certainly does not mean that they are GOOD at it - just that they are less HORRENDOUS than they are at EVERY other aspect of bridge.

Watch the clueless GIBBO robot in the West mercilessly and totally BUTCHER his play of the hand in 1NT:

At trick seven, the braindead dweeb has the QJ87 of hearts remaining in his hand opposite dummy's stiff 4. His NS opponents have, between them, the king, 9, 3, and 2 left. Instead of leading his queen (or jack) the simple-minded oaf tables his SEVEN - allowing me to win the 9 (!) and knock out his now-stiff spade ace. The GIBBO jabroni goes TWO down in a contract that was COLD if he had led the queen or jack.

Throw these GIBBO robots to the wolves. They're even lousy at the ONE AND ONLY part of bridge that they are not COMPLETELY horrendous at. GIBBO robots ROT.

https://tinyurl.brid...se.com/2kzc2rhe

[benellis58]

OMARHEUM has sent two more hands. Not surprisingly, they provide examples of how nauseatingly bad the pathetic GIB definitions and the repulsive GIBBO robots are. Then again, just about every hand illustrates how nauseatingly bad they are. When something is as BROKEN and WRETCHED as GIBBO is, it will usually be quite evident.

Here's OMAR's first hand. He writes "I should have passed 4H, as even if pard had AKxxxxxx of hearts we would need a 2-2 trump split for 6, since he can't also have the ace of spades for his preemptive call. We ended up in a hopeless 5H. But after they let me ruff a spade I had visions of making it. However. the 4-0 trump break meant down one for a score of 64 %. The most frequent result was 4H down one."

My comments:

1. Typically ridiculous nonsense in the GIB definition of 4NT. Yes, it is Blackwood for hearts, but why the HELL should it show "27+ total points" (not that GIB knows ANYTHING about "total" points anyway!)?
2. The definition of North's 5D response is "One or four key cards...". Yes, that IS what 5D means in GIBBO's hopelessly antiquated, inferior Blackwood response structure, but on this specific hand, the "or four" part is not exactly honest or forthcoming, since North quite obviously CANNOT have four, given his preemptive opening.
3. The definition of 5H repeats the sme ridiculous nonsense of it showing "27+ total points".
4. Although "any" lead might turn out "right" or "wrong" on countless random hands, depending on the random layout (since bridge, although a game of skill, is also a game of luck and often dependent on whether a random layout happens to be favourable or unfavourable), East holds an OBVIOUS diamond lead with KQJ10654. He, a GIBBO robot of course (!), leads his stiff 4 of clubs. Maybe he's looking for a ruff with his VOID IN TRUMPS!

https://www.bridgeba...ST%7Cmc%7C10%7C

[benellis58]

OMAR's second hand today. He writes "This one was worth 100% as I gambled out 3NT. Note West's spade lead, East's cover of the spade 9 with his jack, and West's pitch of the club nine to remove any guess in that suit."

My comments:

OMAR has pinpointed THREE absolutely LUDICROUS "defensive" actions by Frick and Frack on this ONE hand. If we TRIED to create WORSE robots, we would have a very difficult time achieving our objective, because GIBBO absolutely stinks.

As expected, the GIB definition of 3NT rots, but the most annoying definition in this particular theatre of the absurd is the one for South's opening 1S bid, which begins with the three immortal words "Major-suit opening." Thanks SO much for that piece of information, GIB! You often FAIL to tell us useful or even crucial information, and your "information" is often incomplete, inaccurate, misleading, or just plain out-and-out WRONG, but by gosh, we can always COUNT ON YOU to let us know that something is a "minor-suit opening" or a "major-suit opening " or that 3NT is "game". What would we DO without you, GIB?

https://www.bridgeba...DT%7Cmc%7C12%7C

[benellis58]

I'm currently playing in a game with three GIBBO robots. What does that mean? It means that bid after bid, card after card, hand after hand, I am getting constant reminders of how GLARINGLY bad the GIBBO robots are. They are the worst. I have nothing but contempt and disdain for the GIBBO robots, true blemishes on the face of bridge. They totally rot.

[benellis58]

A typical GIBBO robot "defence" by Johnny Halfwit and Donald J. Dumbo:

https://tinyurl.brid...se.com/2p8umuyu

[benellis58]

Donald J. Dumbo opens 2D in third. South overcalls 2NT, North transfers with 4D, South bids 4H. All pass.

West is on lead with J10862, Q52, A2, 752. "What to lead, what to lead, what to lead?" Johnny Halfwit mutters to himself. "Well, at least I only have to choose between THREE suits, because Dumbo bid DIAMONDS, so of course I would NEVER even DREAM of leading a DIAMOND."

He tables the spade jack. Declarer guesses hearts and makes all 13 tricks, despite being off...two top DIAMONDS.

No, the pair of Halfwit-Dumbo did NOT get a good score. Do GIBBO robots EVER get a good score? Answer: Yes, sometimes they do. They never DESERVE a good score, but sometimes they accidentally stumble into one.

https://tinyurl.brid...se.com/2p8584e8

[benellis58]

The GIBBO robot in the East is on lead against 3NT. The only suit the NS opponents have bid is clubs. East's hand is J84, Q762, A9875, J.

"I should probably lead a RED suit," he says, thereby INSTANTLY proving that he is perhaps the wisest GIBBO robot who has EVER tarnished the bridge world by his very presence.

"Let's see," says the dweeb, "My DIAMONDS are longer and my DIAMONDS are stronger, so OBVIOUSLY I should lead a...HEART!"

Wrong AGAIN, LOSER!

Why haven't these useless GIBBO fools been incinerated?

https://tinyurl.brid...se.com/54w3p3a2

[benellis58]

Not only do these useless GIBBO twits sell out to ONE HEART, but they only take ONE (!) spade trick in a "defence" that is sublimely WOEFUL even by THEIR totally PITIFUL "standards". GIBBO robots are nothing but garbage, as they continue to prove with each bid, each card, and each board. They rot. They rot worse than a decade-old banana.

https://tinyurl.brid...se.com/46sr9cbv

[benellis58]

North seems to be one of those players who HATES to bid. Or maybe he just hates to bid HEARTS.

https://tinyurl.brid...se.com/3nbrwum8